


black kettle

by laurenjauregui



Series: you make me sick (for being so perfect) drafts [12]
Category: Fifth Harmony (Band)
Genre: F/F, autistic!lauren
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-28 18:33:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15055229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laurenjauregui/pseuds/laurenjauregui
Summary: Camila Cabello is a loner, and she likes it that way. Naturally, when the most popular girl in school, Lauren Jauregui, takes it upon herself to befriend her, Camila isn't too happy about it.yet another ymms draft.





	black kettle

“Hallo.”

Camila ignores the voice, keeping her gaze trained down on her book. She knows that whoever it is definitely _won’t_ be talking to her. She’s been at the same school since freshman year, and she’s yet to find someone who actually wants to talk to her, so you can’t blame her for assuming.

“Um, excuse me.” Camila feels a light poke to her arm, and she blinks in surprise, bothering to glance up from her book. Her gaze falls on Lauren Jauregui, possibly the most popular girl in school, and she wonders what the hell she wants. There’s no way that Camila, the resident loner, is even a blip on Lauren’s social radar. She half expects Lauren to say _sorry, thought you were someone else,_ and move on.

But the older girl runs a hand through her hair, and takes the seat opposite Camila. “I’m Lauren.”

Camila’s eyes narrow sceptically. She’s a little wary of Lauren, especially because she’s talking to her with no obvious motive. “I know. What do you want?”

Lauren doesn’t seem fazed by the less than friendly answer. “Well, I saw you sat here alone, and I thought I’d say hi, since you never seem to sit with anyone, and I think company is nice. So, um, hi. I’m Lauren Michelle Jauregui. I’m eighteen, and I’m still a senior since I started school a year late. Also, um, I like lions. Do you like lions?”

Camila frowns. “Uh, sure. They’re kind of cool, I guess.”

Lauren rocks a little on her seat. “If you said no, I would’ve had to leave. I can’t be friends with someone who doesn’t like lions.”

Wanting to be left alone, Camila sends the girl a malicious smile. “I changed my mind. I don’t like lions. Bye.”

She waits for Lauren to leave, but the other girl doesn’t move. Instead, her brow furrows and she keeps talking. “But…you said they were cool before. Can I try and change your mind back? I know a lot about lions, because they’re my-”

“Look, if this is pity, I don’t need it.” Camila interrupts, snapping a little. “I didn’t make friends freshman year because I don’t want them, so if that’s your goal, don’t bother. And if this is some prank your friends cooked up to _make fun of the girl with no friends_ , it won’t work. I know you’re too innocent to see the bad in anyone, but newsflash, your friends are bitches.”

Lauren frowns even more. “I was just trying to be nice. There’s no need to be so rude. Unless you’re being sarcastic. Are you being sarcastic? Because I’m autistic, so I don’t understand sarcasm unless you explain, and DJ tells me that ruins the effect of it.”

“I’m being as serious as cancer,” Camila says, dogearring her page and slamming her book shut. She shoulders her backpack and sends Lauren one last look. “I don’t want friends.”

With that, she turns on her heel and stalks out of the library, leaving Lauren alone at the table. Lauren cocks her head to the side as she watches the girl retreat, not understanding what she did wrong. She hadn’t meant to upset Camila. Maybe Camila had realised she lied, and was mad because of that.

The truth is, Lauren hadn’t just seen Camila and decided to come over and say hi. Lauren had been watching Camila for around a month, and she hopes that doesn’t come off as creepy, because she doesn’t mean it in a stalker way. She’d noticed that Camila never had anyone to sit with, and it reminded her of herself in freshman year, before she decided to be herself unapologetically and make friends, and she had decided to _extend an olive branch_.

(She doesn’t know what olive branches have to do with making friends, but that was the phrase her mami had used when she’d asked her if she should approach Camila.)

She hums to herself, not sure what she’d done wrong. When she was younger, she was always scared of talking to people in case she said the wrong thing, or they made fun of her for her autism, but she tried, and most people just called her cute, even if they didn’t want to be friends. Her nightmare had come true in talking to Camila, and she decides that she’s not going to let it knock her back. She’s going to talk to Camila again, and tell her that she doesn’t appreciate people looking down on her for being autistic.

Besides, she thought she was okay at making friends by now. She used to _come on strong_ , which is what Normani had told her when Lauren had asked her best friend’s first impression of her, but she thought she’d fixed that now. She’s had lots of practice, because she makes sure to be nice to everyone. Normani tells her she’s really popular, and that lots of people like her, and Lauren is always appreciative when people invite her to parties, but she’s not comfortable in loud spaces. When the school’s general population found out she was autistic, they petitioned and succeeded in making the junior prom a headphones party, and Lauren was over the moon, because she was always worried she wouldn’t be able to go to a prom.

She shakes her head to get rid of that train of thought, because she needs to focus on the task at hand. She needs to find Camila and give her _a piece of her mind_.

(Not literally, she just wants to talk to her in a firm but informative manner.)

_Honestly_ , Lauren thinks _, some idioms and colloquialisms are so weird. Just like the allistic people who came up with them._

She stands up and grabs her backpack, exiting the library and trying to think of places she’d seen Camila before. She noted the other girl in the music room, and apparently that’s where Camila spends her lunches – or so Lauren had gathered from watching her – so Lauren thinks she might’ve gone there for some alone time.

She says her signature _hallo_ to the peers that greet her, even giving one of them, a girl called Keana that she considers herself friends with, an awkward hug in greeting before she scampers away in search of Camila.

She’s almost at the music room when she’s stopped.

“Hey, I’ve been looking all over for you,” one of her closest friends, Lucy, catches up with her. “Listen, we’ve got a biology project being announced today, and-”

Lauren’s attention is completely caught. “A project? Can I do something about lions? I know lots about their biology.”

“I think it’s on genetics and cells, just the stuff we’ve been covering recently,” Lucy explains, “I’m sure you’ll figure out a way to fit lions in there. But that’s not the point. Point is, I need you to be my partner and I’m asking you before anyone else because you’re my best friend and I love you and I know you don’t want me to fail this project.”

Lauren blinks. “Well, since you asked first, yes, we can be partners. But I know you’re only saying how much you love me because you wanted to _butter me up_. Not literally, I’m using an idiom, because you obviously don’t have butter. But it’s not necessary to use flattery. I like working with you because you’re smart and you do your work. I banned Dinah from being my partner because I had to do everything while she took lots of selfies. Do you happen to know where Camila Cabello is?”

Lucy takes a few moments to digest Lauren’s mini monologue, before grinning. Lauren notes how Lucy holds her arm out, and knowing that her friend is going to touch her, doesn’t get uncomfortable when she feels an arm around her shoulders. “Well, that’s typical Dinah for you. And no, I don’t even know who that is. You got a little crush, Laur?”

Lauren frowns. “No. Though, she is very pretty. I just want to make her be my friend, because she doesn’t have any friends. I talked to her in the library earlier, but she was rude, so I’m going to tell her that she’s not allowed to be rude to me or it’s ableist.”

“You stole that joke from me,” Lucy sends her a teasing smile, “my _you can’t give me detention, that’s biphobic, because I’m bi and don’t want a detention_ joke that got me _two_ detentions.”

“I’ve never had a detention before.” Lauren comments, because she’s proud of her spotless record. “Will you help me find Camila?”

“So you can harass her into being friends with you?” Lucy laughs, but before Lauren can clarify that it’s _not_ harassment, it’s _persuasion_ , her friend keeps talking. “Sure. You might need some backup if she turns out to be a bitch.”

“She was rude to me already, so I’m counting on a hostile reaction.” Lauren answers. “I think she may be in the music room. Could you wait outside if she’s in there? If she starts being mean you can come in and help me tell her off. But I can handle myself.”

Lucy just smiles at her. “I know you can. You’re a badass.”

“Yes.” Lauren agrees, humming to herself. “Have you seen Dinah and Mani yet? I know they had cheerleading things to do, but it’s almost lunch and I haven’t seen them yet. Also, how did you know about the science project?”

“Nicole texted me about it because she’s got the class now and she said we’d get it next period, so I needed to find you and make sure you’re my partner and that I don’t – quote – _fail miserably like last time_.” Lucy says, and Lauren frowns a little. “I love that my girlfriend has faith in me.”

Lauren is about to ask if her friend is being sarcastic, but her face lights up in a smile when she sees Camila sat on the steps outside the music room. Lauren can see through the windows that there’s a class in session, so Camila must not get to sit in there in her free periods.

“Hallo,” Lauren shrugs Lucy’s arm from her shoulder and comes to a stop by Camila. “I wanted to say-”

“Oh, wow, brought one of your bitchy friends to beat me up for denying your pity friendship?” Camila snaps at her when she spots Lucy. “Typical. I almost managed to go through all of high school without being bothered, but I guess nothing can ever go right for me.”

Lauren rocks on her heels. “I don’t like the way you’re talking to me and it makes me think that you look down on me for being autistic. It’s not nice to belittle people for the way they think. I don’t make fun of allistic people… much. And I don’t know what I did to offend you, but it wasn’t intentional, and you shouldn’t be so rude when someone is trying to be nice.”

Lauren folds her arms across her chest, happy with her little speech. But Camila just scoffs.

“I couldn’t give less of a fuck that you’re autistic. I just said I don’t want to be friends, which means _don’t talk to me_.” Camila shoots her a look that Lauren can’t read, so it doesn’t bother her. “I don’t want friends.”

Lauren opens her mouth to protest, but Lucy takes her arm and shakes her head. “Laur, she’s not worth it. Come on. I know someone you can make friends with that _isn’t_ a raging bitch.”

Lauren frowns as Lucy pulls her away, because she doesn’t think it’s very nice that her friend had called Camila a bitch to her face. “Lucy, you can’t call her a bitch in front of her. That’s rude.”

They’re not quite out of Camila’s earshot, and Lauren hears the younger Latina say, _“that’s a bit like the pot calling the kettle black there, Vives_ ,” and she has no idea what _that’s_ supposed to mean. So, she yanks her arm out of Lucy’s grip and goes back to Camila, because she likes knowing new figurative language. It’s interesting to her, how allistic people communicate.

“What do you mean by that?” Lauren asks, and Camila lets out a long sigh. “ _Pot calling the kettle black_. What do you mean?”

“Oh my god, google it and leave me the fuck alone.” Camila barks, and Lauren frowns, but doesn’t leave. “Well? Leave me alone.”

“I just want to know what it means in this context,” Lauren persists. “Can you tell me?”

Camila lets out a frustrated growl, and Lauren doesn’t know what to say. Lucy takes her arm again and answers the question for her. “Laur, it was the grumpy kid’s way of calling me a bitch, too. Come on.”

Lauren sends Camila a disapproving look. “Well, I think you’re being a _black kettle_ right now.”

“Lauren, come on,” Lucy tugs her, and Lauren just sighs, shooting one last look at Camila before following Lucy away. “Don’t bother with her again, Lo. She’s clearly got a massive steel rod jammed firmly up her-”

“Hey, wait.”

When Lauren hears the raspy voice, she knows it’s Camila, and she smiles a little. She’s changed her mind!

She turns around and sees Camila holding out a key. “This fell out of your pocket when you left.”

Lauren identifies her _Lion King_ keychain, and takes the key from Camila, blinking a little when her fingertips brush against the other girl’s and she feels a little spark. Camila’s cheeks turn pink, but Lauren just frowns. “You just electric shocked me. You must have lots of static.”

With that, Lauren tucks her keys into her jeans pocket instead of the one on her hoodie, and follows Lucy down the hallway, leaving Camila alone.

-

“Triple scoop strawberry cone, please,” Lauren orders, rocking on her heels. She doesn’t know the boy working the counter at her favourite ice cream parlour – he must be a new employee – but he’ll soon come to know her usual order.

She hums to herself as she waits for her cone, excited to have her favourite ice cream. It’s part of her regular Saturday routine, when she’s having a lazy day. She makes a point to get out of the house for an hour, going to the beach for ice cream, walking until she finishes it, then going home to watch some TV.

When the boy hands her the ice cream and she gives him the exact change, she skips out of the ice cream parlour happily.

_Straight_ into a little kid.

Her ice cream hits the floor with a _splat_ , having fallen off the cone, and Lauren lets out a frustrated whine. She does her breathing exercises to calm herself down, but she’s getting really upset, because she only brought enough money for one ice cream, and she _needs_ to have her triple scoop strawberry cone, because it’s part of her routine.

“Sorry.” The little girl says. “Kaki, I knocked some girl’s ice cream out of her hand!”

Lauren screws her eyes shut, because she’s starting to get stressed. She can’t diverge from her routine. She _needs_ her ice cream, but she can’t get another because the new boy in the shop doesn’t know her, so he wouldn’t _understand_. She drops the empty cone in favour of flapping her hands in front of her, a stim she does when she’s upset.

“Sofi, what’d I tell you about running off-” Lauren places the voice just as the speaker identifies her, “- _Lauren_?”

“God dammit, Sofi,” Camila mutters, and Lauren feels her approaching. She opens her eyes for a moment, surprised that Camila actually looks concerned, but the sensory input is too much and she needs to close her eyes again. “Um, sorry, my little sister is kind of going through this phase where she likes to run ahead and I’m not exactly the _healthiest_ person in the world and I’m rambling so I’m just going to go and get you a new ice cream so we can forget this ever happened. What’d you order?”

Lauren gets her breathing to even out first, because her routine _isn’t_ ruined if Camila buys her a new ice cream. She tries her best to make her speech as smooth as possible. “Triple- triple s-scoop straw- strawberry cone.”

“Okay, um,” Camila says, “I’ll be right back. Sofi, come on.”

Lauren hears Camila leave, and she uses the alone time to calm herself down. She’s finally able to open her eyes, and she reassures herself that it’s okay, that her routine is still intact. She’s finally calm when Camila comes back out of the ice cream parlour, and Lauren beams, albeit a little shakily, at the sight of her new ice cream.

“Thank you,” Lauren murmurs her thanks as she takes the cone, and finally has a lick. “I am glad you bought me a new one. I will pay you back at school on Monday.”

“It’s fine, it’s just an ice cream,” Camila murmurs, taking her little sister’s hand. “Anyway, come on, Sofi.”

Lauren puts a name to the ice cream murderer; Sofi. The little girl shakes her head when Camila tries to pull her away. “I want to meet your friend. I’ve never met any of your friends before, except Ariana, but she’s-”

“ _Sofi_ ,” Camila harshly cuts her off, “she’s not my friend. And I told you not to- not to mention _her_.”

“Yes, I asked Camila if she wanted to be friends, but she declined my offer,” Lauren says, “I will leave now, because I have to go for a walk, or my routine will be ruined. Goodbye.”

“Wait,” Sofi says, “how come you told mami about her, if she’s not your friend?”

Camila looks angry, and Lauren knows that angry Camila equals mean Camila, and she doesn’t feel like arguing with someone. “I didn’t! I didn’t- uh, mention you to my mom, she’s just-”

“You did! I heard you,” Sofi continues, “you were talking about how some Lauren girl asked you to be friends, and you said no because of Ari-”

“Jesus f- _Christ_ , am I going to have to put duct tape over your mouth?” Camila glares at her sister, before levelling Lauren with an equally vicious look. “Just… forget she said anything, okay?”

Lauren licks her ice cream, and after a few moments, nods passively. “I can’t make myself physically forget, but I won’t mention it to anyone. I might tell Lucy that even though you’re a _black kettle_ , you bought me a new ice cream, so she can stop saying nasty things about you.”

“I- I didn’t…” Camila trails off, and after a few moments, sighs, “the whole pot calling the kettle black thing is like… criticising someone for a trait you also have. Basically personified hypocrisy.”

Lauren blinks in confusion, but she connects the answer to the question she’d asked on Friday. “Oh. Well… that makes more sense. And it explains why my sister laughed at me when I told her she was a _black kettle_ for stealing the TV remote.”

Lauren notices a ghost of a smile on Camila’s face. “Well, uh… sorry about that.”

After a few moments of awkward silence – at least for Camila – Lauren decides to extend another _olive branch_. “Would you like to join me on my walk?”

Sofi answers for the older Cabello. “Yeah! So, Lauren, are you cool? Do you go to parties? I can’t wait until I’m in high school, I’m going to be the coolest person there.”

“Um, I have lots of friends, but that’s just because I’m nice,” Lauren shrugs, “I like to talk to people and ask them their opinion on lions. If they don’t like lions they can’t be my friend, that’s why I’m not friends with Camila.”

“I- um,” Camila looks anywhere but Lauren, “I like lions.”

“Oh,” Lauren brightens, “Well, I guess we could be friends, then. But you don’t want to be and you’d like me to go away.”

Camila doesn’t answer, just keeps her head down as Sofi babbles to Lauren about all of the things she wants to do when she’s a grown up. Lauren talks to Sofi as they walk down the beach, and the eldest Latina is happy that her routine stayed intact, and she’s even okay with this little twist.

“I’ve never seen you on the beach at this time before, and I come here on every single one of my lazy days.” Lauren comments as she finishes her ice cream. “I need my triple scoop strawberry cone. It’s my favourite ice cream. I like strawberry flavoured things.”

“Kaki likes bananas,” Sofi says, “one time when she was younger, I heard her say to her friend that it’s funny she likes bananas because they’re shaped like something else she doesn’t like. They both laughed, but I didn’t really get it.”

Camila blushes, and similarly to Sofi, the joke goes over Lauren’s head, and she doesn’t understand why Camila is embarrassed about liking bananas. She shrugs it off and laughs politely, frowning when Camila stops by a car.

“Come on, Sofi,” Camila opens the car door. “Now that you’re done with your ice cream, we’re going home.”

Sofi pouts as she climbs into the backseat. “But I don’t want-”

Camila cuts her off by shutting the car door, and then she finally looks up at Lauren. Lauren doesn’t meet her eyes, but smiles at her.

“Listen, that joke she told you about, about me being gay, it’s-” Camila sighs, “I don’t want it getting out because I hate being noticed, so can you please not tell anyone? About… about all of the stuff she said?”

Lauren frowns. “What joke about you being gay?”

Camila’s eyes widen, and when she smacks a hand to her forehead, Lauren is a little taken aback. “Fuck. I forgot that you wouldn’t have gotten that and… oh my _god_. Someone needs to just… sew my mouth shut.”

“That would be painful, though,” Lauren comments, “Why would you want that to happen?”

“Look, just… I’ll be your friend as long as you promise not to tell anyone what my sister told you. Or… what I told you with my big mouth,” Camila mumbles the last part, and Lauren doesn’t know _what_ she’d tell people, or what Camila is really talking about, but she hears the offer of friendship and nods. “You won’t tell?”

“Not if- if we’ll be friends,” Lauren rocks on her heels, because she likes that she’s making a lonely person less lonely. “I won’t tell.”

She decides not to ask what Camila is talking about, because she really doesn’t know what secret Camila is so desperate to keep. Why would it be bad if people knew she liked bananas? But, she doesn’t want the friendship offer to be retracted, so she keeps her mouth shut.

“Good, okay,” Camila says, mostly to herself, “So, um, do you need a ride home or something?”

“Oh, that would be nice,” Lauren accepts, “yes. I took the bus here, because I was too excited about getting ice cream to concentrate properly on driving. I am a good driver, when I concentrate, but I get distracted a lot.”

Camila opens her mouth to say something, but closes it and shakes her head. When she turns around, Lauren catches the real smile on her face, and she rocks on her heels, one of her happy stims.

“You’re smiling.” Lauren points out. “That makes you look even prettier.”

“I- um,” Camila shakes her head, and opens up the car door for her, “just… put your address into the GPS.”

On the drive to Lauren’s, Sofi is the one to fill the car with conversation, talking about all of the things she’d done at school. Lauren makes sure to reply to everything, even if she’s not sure what Sofi is talking about most of the time.

When they pull up outside her house, Lauren pats on her thighs before turning to Camila. “Thank you for the ride. You’re not a _black kettle_.”

“I- um, yeah,” Camila mumbles, “see you in school or whatever.”

“Yes, that is most likely, as we share many classes.” Lauren announces, before she unbuckles her seatbelt and gets out of the car. “Goodbye, Sofi. It was nice to make friends with you.”

Lauren makes her way up the driveway, humming to herself. She can feel Camila’s gaze on her as she makes her way up the front porch steps, and once she’s inside her house, the car drives away.

Camila had waited to make sure she’d gotten in safe.

-

Camila has a plan of action.

She’s going to deal with Lauren Jauregui how she deals with all of her problems; avoidance.

She shies away from any of her usual places, finding a spot in the courtyard to sit and read her book. She makes it through the morning break without any interactions with Lauren, and she’s pleased with herself for throwing the other girl off her trail.

But when lunchtime comes around, and it starts _raining_ … the courtyard isn’t an option. So, once she’s grabbed her lunch from her locker, she makes the walk to the music room. Thankfully, when she gets there, it’s empty, but this is a place she frequents, and she knows that _Lauren_ knows that.

Admittedly, she feels a little bad about avoiding Lauren. She knows that Lauren is sweet, and she doesn’t have bad intentions, but after everything with Ariana… she doesn’t know if she can do it again. She can’t get attached to anyone else.

She’s in the middle of eating her banana when the door to the music room opens. She hopes and prays to any powerful force that might be listening that it’s the teacher, that it’s a random student getting something, that it’s—

“Hallo!”

Camila squeezes her eyes shut and sighs. “Hi, Lauren.”

“I was looking for you earlier, but I couldn’t seem to find you,” Lauren announces, pulling out the chair next to Camila and humming happily. “But I found you now! So- um, hi. How are you?”

“Fine,” Camila mutters, giving her a one word reply. If she’s distant enough, Lauren will get the message. She has to.

“Well, I am good too!” Lauren exclaims, tapping on the table. “Would you like to come for a sleepover at my house? Sleepovers are good for getting to know people.”

“Um…” Camila pauses, trying to think of an excuse, “my mom doesn’t let me go to sleepovers.”

“Oh, that’s fine, I will come to your house,” Lauren decides, and Camila sighs, “also, give me your phone number please. Lucy told me that texting strengthens friendships, and Lucy’s social smart, so she teaches me everything I need to know.”

Camila doesn’t make a move to give Lauren her number. “Why don’t you give me yours? Then I’ll- I’ll text you later.”

(She totally doesn’t plan on texting Lauren, but this is the best way to appease her.)

“Yes, I will put my number in,” Lauren nods in affirmative, and when Camila hands over hr phone with a triumphant smirk, Lauren types out her number. But when Lauren’s phone pings, Camila realises what had happened. “I texted myself, so I had your number straight away. Which emoji would you like with your contact?”

Camila shrugs. “Whatever.”

Lauren stares at her for a moment, before her face sinks into a frown. “But you _have_ to pick.”

Camila just sighs. “I don’t care, just pick whatever you want.”

“But that’s not-” Lauren squeezes her eyes shut and shakes her head, “that’s not how it _works_. You need to pick it, because-”

“You know, it’s not being a very good friend, to force me to do something,” Camila snaps at her, and Lauren’s face falls. The older girl looks devastated, and Camila hadn’t expected her words to have that effect. So, she gives a reluctant answer. “The- the pizza emoji.”

Lauren’s expression brightens a little, and she puts the pizza next to Camila’s contact. But then, she starts snapping a bracelet on her wrist and frowning. “I am sorry that I’m not being a good friend. I will do better next time.”

It makes Camila’s heart hurt, to be mean and push this sweet girl away, but she has to do it. She can’t get attached, because she can’t bear the heartbreak of losing someone. Ariana had taught her that much.

“Just leave me alone,” Camila forces out, and Lauren’s eyes start to water. “I don’t want friends.”

“But… on Saturday, you said we could be,” Lauren replies, looking adorably confused, “you said that as long as I didn’t tell people you liked bananas and that you were gay, then we could be friends. And I promise I won’t tell, even though I still don’t understand why either of those things are bad.”

“Leave me alone,” Camila reiterates, a little harsher this time, “I don’t want friends, and if I did, I wouldn’t…”

When Camila stops herself, Lauren tilts her head to the side in confusion. “You wouldn’t what? I don’t understand it when people don’t finish their sentences. Sometimes they do it to leave some implications, but I can’t pick up on these, so please explain them to me.”

Camila bites down on her bottom lip and shakes her head. She’d wanted so badly to snap, to call Lauren something that would push her away permanently, but she couldn’t do it. Just one look into those innocent green eyes, and she _couldn’t fucking do it_.

“It’s nothing,” Camila mumbles, “I just don’t want to get close to anyone.”

Lauren frowns. “Why?”

Camila looks up at Lauren, who doesn’t meet her eyes, and shakes her head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay,” Lauren accepts her answer, “but- um, if you do want to talk about it, you can talk to me. I know that I don’t always understand, but I can try to and help you feel better.”

Camila looks at her in surprise, overwhelmed by the other girl’s kindness, but she pushes any emotion down and doesn’t answer, opting to open her bag of chips and hold it out to Lauren. “Want one?”

“No, thank you,” Lauren replies, tapping on the table again. “When do you want me to come over for our sleepover? I’d like as much notice as possible so it can fit into my schedule, because I need schedule and routine to function.”

“Um, whenever,” Camila shrugs, not too keen on making plans, “I’m not exactly busy.”

“I will come over on Saturday, as I have the evening free.” Lauren decides on the spot. “Please text me your address.”

Camila just nods and looks down at her feet. “I’m sorry.”

Lauren frowns. “Why? Did you do something bad?”

“For being mean to you,” Camila mumbles, “I just don’t- don’t want to get attached.”

“Attached?” Lauren hums in thought. “Well, I don’t think we’ll end up conjoining in any way, so I think you’re okay.”

Camila laughs a little; it’s weak, but it’s there. “You’re- um, actually kind of funny.”

“I am?” Lauren asks, surprised. “I wasn’t trying to be, but I am happy that I cheered you up. Can we watch _The Lion King_ at our sleepover? It is my favourite movie, as it is a cinematic masterpiece.”

“Um, sure,” Camila nods, a little uncomfortable at the idea of spending a whole night with Lauren. She doesn’t know how she’ll manage to keep her at arm’s length enough for the other girl to think they’re friends. “I don’t really… like it. But… okay.”

“You- you don’t…” Lauren stands up in shock and shakes her head, moving towards the door. “I am sorry, but I cannot be friends with someone who does not like _The Lion King_.”

Camila blinks in surprise as Lauren makes a hasty exit, but smiles to herself when she realises what had happened. She’d gotten rid of her without hurting her feelings. Perfect.

-

“I just don’t know why I can’t stop thinking about her.”

Sinu squeezes Camila’s hand, sending her a comforting smile. Camila had told her everything that had happened with Lauren; how Lauren had left her alone and effectively ignored her for a week now, and how much it’s annoying her.

She didn’t think she’d care this much, but Lauren had walked into her life, done something to Camila, and then walked right back out.

“Do you think you want to be friends?” Sinu asks. “You said you’d thought about it when she talked to you the first time.”

“Yeah, but not _seriously_ , and… and I can’t have friends,” Camila shakes her head, “I can’t get attached to anyone again because that’s just one more person to worry about, and _Ariana_ -”

“Mija, what happened to Ariana was a tragic accident,” Sinu assures her, wiping away the tears that are brimming at Camila’s eyes. “You can’t stay cut off from your peers forever.”

Camila buries her face into her mom’s shoulder and cries her heart out, thinking about her best friend and how much she _misses_ her.

-

**_Camila (7:22PM): uh hi_ **

**_Camila (7:22PM): i was only joking when i said i didn’t like the lion king_ **

**_Camila (7:22PM): i didn’t think it’d make you ignore me_ **

**_Lauren (7:24PM): Really?_ **

**_Camila (7:24PM): really_ **

**_Lauren (7:25PM): Oh. I am sorry that I decided not to be your friend because of that. It upset me to do so, because I thought you looked lonely, and I don’t want you to be lonely. When you’re lonely, you don’t smile, and I think you’re even prettier when you do that._ **

If anyone else had sent a text like that, Camila would’ve taken it as shameless flirting and blocked them immediately. But with Lauren, she knows the other girl is just speaking her mind and being honest.

**_Camila (7:26PM): you can come over for a sleepover this saturday if you want_ **

**_Lauren (7:27PM): I would love to! However, I already made plans with Lucy._ **

**_Camila (7:27PM): oh_ **

**_Camila (7:28PM): that’s okay then_ **

When Lauren doesn’t respond, Camila is admittedly a little upset. She knows she has no right to be; she’s the one that wanted rid of Lauren, but it hurts that Lauren isn’t so excitable and making as much of an effort as before.

Ten minutes later, when Camila is deciding on a TV show to watch, she gets a text.

**_Lauren (7:40PM): After a lot of thought, and doing my breathing exercises to make myself feel better, I have changed my schedule for this week. I will come over to your house on Saturday, even though it is making me upset to think about how my routine will be disrupted, because I do not want you to be lonely, Camila._ **

**_Camila (7:41PM): you don’t have to do that for me lauren_ **

**_Camila (7:41PM): it’s okay if you want to hang with your actual friends_ **

**_Lauren (7:42PM): You are my actual friend and I would like to spend time with you. :)_ **

Camila doesn’t know why, but when she reads the message, her heart flutters, and she promises herself she’s not going to let this get out of hand.

-

“Hallo.”

“Hi,” Camila opens the front door, watching awkwardly as Lauren takes off her shoes and sits down on the stairs, smiling up at her. “Um… yeah…”

“What is the schedule for this evening?” Lauren asks, and Camila blinks in surprise. “Can you tell me?”

“Um, well, I figured we could get takeout,” Camila murmurs, always using any excuse to order from Domino’s. “And- um… watch a movie?”

Lauren frowns a little. “That’s all?”

“I’m sorry, you have a lot of friends, you’re probably used to parties,” Camila apologises immediately, before she can even think about it. “We could do something else.”

Lauren shakes her head. “I do not like parties. They’re too loud. Did you know that people petitioned so junior prom last year would be a headphones dance, so I could go? Anyway, I meant exact times for things.”

Camila looks down at her feet. “Well, um, I didn’t… really plan that.”

“Oh,” Lauren’s face falls, but she plasters a smile back on and nods. “That is okay, because that means I get to plan it, and I love doing that.”

“Uh, yeah,” Camila murmurs, “I knew that.”

“You did?” Lauren looks up and beams at her. “I think it is very sweet, that you saved the planning for me.”

At Lauren’s bright smile, Camila feels something inside her stir. She pushes the feeling away and nods to Lauren’s bag. “Shall I take that upstairs for you?”

“Yes, okay,” Lauren nods, following Camila up the stairs anyway. She walks into Camila’s bedroom behind her and looks around. “It’s not very tidy in here.”

If anyone else had made a comment like that, Camila would’ve snapped at them, but she knows that Lauren doesn’t mean it like that. “Uh, yeah.”

“A tidy environment equals a tidy mind, Camila,” Lauren tells her, sitting down on Camila’s bed and bouncing herself a little. “You should tidy up, then maybe you would be smiling more.”

“If I tidy, it just gets messy again,” Camila shrugs, past caring about the state of her bedroom. “There’s not much point.”

Lauren studies her for a moment, before she nods. “Okay then.”

Camila bites down on her bottom lip, knowing that Lauren is oblivious to how uncomfortable she is. “So… um…”

Lauren tilts her head to the side. “Yes?”

“I- I don’t really know what to say,” Camila admits, sitting down on the bed but keeping her distance from Lauren. “It’s been a while since… since anyone came over.”

“I thought you didn’t have any friends,” Lauren asks her bluntly, “Because you don’t want them. That’s what you told me.”

Camila feels the tears sting her eyes the way they always do when this topic comes up. “I had a friend. Once.”

“Oh, well, it wasn’t very nice of them to leave you alone.” Lauren announces. “That’s rude.”

“She didn’t… it wasn’t her,” Camila sighs, shaking her head. “She was hurt. And she’s not here anymore.”

Lauren blinks at her. “Oh. That Ariana girl your sister mentioned?”

At the sound of her name, Camila feels that usual sting of heartbreak. “I- yeah.”

“What happened?” Lauren asks her, and Camila squeezes her eyes shut, shaking her head. After a few moments, Lauren wraps her arms around her in an awkward hug. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“She was in an accident.” Camila blurts out, not knowing why she’s trusting Lauren with this information. “After a party that... she shouldn’t have been there. She just went to impress a guy, and she drank more than she should’ve and got into a car with said drunken dumb guy. The car crashed. The idiot got out fine, but she… she was hurt badly. It- it didn’t kill her, but it left her braindead. Her parents… took her off life support a week later.”

Lauren pulls away from her and frowns. “Is that why you don’t want to have any other friends? In case they get hurt too?”

Camila just nods; she doesn’t know if she has it in her to talk. Even though it happened two years ago, the wound is still fresh for Camila.

“Um, well…” Lauren rubs her hand along her thigh. “I promise I will try not to get hurt and leave you.”

Camila lets out a weak laugh at Lauren’s words, knowing that the sentiment is genuine. “Okay.”

“I am sorry that you had to go through something as troubling as losing a friend at our age.” Lauren continues, looking down at her feet. “I remember how painful it was to lose my abuela, because when I was little, she was the only one who understood me.”

Camila remembers the day she’d come into school, and everyone seemed to have allocated that day as a particular day of mourning for Lauren and her abuela. Camila had been so angry about it, because nobody had cared when Ariana had passed. The students at their school were more bothered about making everything about their precious _Lauren._

It had made Camila hate her.

“What do you mean?” Camila asks, and Lauren frowns. “That she was the only one who understood you.”

“Well, um, my mami resented me because I wasn’t- um, _normal._ She’s better now though, same with my dad, but he’s always been caring. He just didn’t get it sometimes.” Lauren shrugs. “My abuela never tried to change or _cure_ me. She taught me that it was okay for me to be different, when I really hated myself.”

“Oh,” Camila murmurs, “I didn’t realise you’d ever hated that you were different. You always seem so confident.”

“Well, I am _now.”_ Lauren announces. “But before, I was really hurting and all I wanted was to be like everyone else. And with help from my abuela, I embraced my differences and decided to put myself out there. And now lots of people are nice. That’s why I wanted to make friends with you, because you reminded me of me in freshman year.”

Camila frowns a little. “I did?”

“Yes,” Lauren nods, “you seemed like you were very sad, and I wanted to make you happy.”

“Why?” Camila looks up at her, catching Lauren’s gaze, but Lauren looks away. “Why me? I’m sure there were plenty of people you could’ve talked to.”

“I don’t know,” Lauren shrugs, “It was just like there was a pull. I saw you and wanted to look after you.”

“Oh,” Camila murmurs, “okay.”

Lauren smiles a little. “Anyway, I would like to watch a show now.”

“Okay,” Camila nods and picks up her laptop, “and Lauren?”

“Yes?”

“Thanks for not letting me push you away.”

-

“Well?”

Camila sighs reluctantly. “It’s a good movie.”

“No,” Lauren pouts, “say it properly.”

Again, Camila sighs. “Fine. _The Lion King_ is a cinematic masterpiece.”

Lauren beams. “Yes. You are right. It is.”

Camila smiles back a little. “Why do you like it so much?”

“It’s my special interest,” Lauren answers, “just like lions are. Other people describe it as a hyperfixation, but that doesn’t sound _good_ to me. It’s a special interest.”

“But why?” Camila asks. “Like, why did you pick it as a special interest?”

“I didn’t pick it, it just happened,” Lauren shrugs, “and I have Nala, and when I was little, I thought she was real, and I liked watching her talk.”

“That’s cute,” Camila smiles a little, “you’re really cute, actually.”

“Thank you!” Lauren beams. “Many people have told me that. I think you are beautiful, Camila.”

Camila blushes. “You do?”

“Mhm,” Lauren bobs her head in affirmative. “And you’re even prettier, now you’re not being a _black kettle_.”

When Camila blushes even more, Lauren frowns a little, unsure as to why her comment would make Camila blush. But she shrugs it off, not caring.

“I’m sorry,” Camila murmurs, “for trying to push you away.”

“Well, it’s okay,” Lauren smiles, “you didn’t call me the ‘r’ word or the ‘f’ word, so it’s okay.”

Camila sighs a little, shaking her head. “I couldn’t call you either of those things.”

“Yes, because I’m not,” Lauren nods in agreement, happy that Camila understands that, “Do I have to sleep on the floor?”

Camila looks down at the floor where Lauren’s bag is. “You can stay here if you’re okay with sharing a bed with me. Or, uh, the guest room is free.”

Lauren nods. “Nala and I will stay here.”

As Lauren snuggles her stuffed animal to her chest, Camila smiles. “You still sleep with your stuffed animal?”

“Yes,” Lauren announces, kissing Nala on the top of her head. “I love having something to cuddle, and Nala is my- um _security item_ , according to a therapist I used to go to. She tried to make me get rid of her, so I stopped going there.”

“Yeah, that’s mean of her,” Camila replies, and Lauren beams, happy she agrees. “I- um, I think it’s cute.”

“Yes, I am cute and Nala is cute,” Lauren agrees, shuffling under Camila’s blankets and resting her head on the pillow. “Your bed is comfortable. I do not want to move from it until morning time, but I need to complete my nightly routine as best as I can.”

Camila lays down next to her. “What’s your nightly routine?”

Lauren beams, happy that Camila is interested. “Well, first, I like to get into my pyjamas, and then I go downstairs and make myself a glass of warm milk and a slice of toast for a snack. Once I finish my milk and snack, I go upstairs, shower, brush my teeth, wash my face, then go to bed. Do you have a nightly routine?”

“Yeah, I go to bed at three in the morning and stay up until five.” Camila jokes, not hearing Lauren’s small gasp. “Rinse and repeat.”

“That’s very bad for your health, Camila,” Lauren tells her, looking concerned. “I am glad that we are friends now, because it means I get to make sure you go to sleep at a decent time.”

After a small smile, Camila laughs. “Okay, mom.”

“I am not your mother,” Lauren answers, tilting her head to the side in confusion. “I’m Lauren Jauregui, your classmate.”

“I know, it was a joke.” Camila says, and Lauren’s expression relaxes. She laughs politely, even though she hadn’t understood it. “You didn’t get it, did you?”

“No, but I’m sure it was very funny,” Lauren says, smiling, “Am I being a good friend? By laughing at your jokes?”

After a few moments, Camila nods. “Yeah. You are.”

“I am glad!” Lauren beams, playing with Nala’s tail. “I would like to make sure you get to bed on time tonight. Would you like to partake in my nightly routine with me?”

Camila hums in agreement. “Okay, cutie.”

The term of endearment slips out, and while Camila looks embarrassed and ashamed that it did, Lauren doesn’t pick up on any of that. Instead, she smiles, and stands up, stretching.

“I am glad that you think I’m cute.” Lauren says, rocking on her heels. “I think you’re cute, too. Can we go and make some warm milk now?”

After a few moments of hesitation, Camila stands up too, nodding to the door. “Come on, let’s go.”

Lauren follows her downstairs after patting Nala on the head, assuring the stuffed lion that she’ll be back, humming happily. “Do you have a girlfriend, Camila?”

Camila stops dead in her tracks, and Lauren startles, bumping into her. The younger Latina sighs and shakes her head. “No. I don’t. I’ve never had one.”

“Oh,” Lauren hums in thought. “My best friend, Lucy, has a girlfriend; her name is Nicole. Nicole is nicer to me than Lucy is, but Lucy tells me she has to make fun of me, because she’s one of my best friends, and that’s her _job_. I don’t understand why, because I’m not paying her to be my friend, so it’s not a job.”

“You don’t have to pay Vives to be a bitch,” Camila mutters, and Lauren frowns a little, confused. Camila’s next words are louder. “I’ve had… feelings… for someone before, but… didn’t work out.”

Lauren shakes her head. “I would appreciate it if you didn’t call my best friend a bitch. I don’t know why you don’t like her, because Lucy is very caring and sweet, and I love her a lot, but I don’t want you to say mean things about her. I can’t be your friend if you do that, because Lucy was my friend first.”

“Sorry,” Camila mumbles, shaking her head. “You weren’t supposed to… hear that.”

“Oh, well, it’s okay, because you apologised,” Lauren smiles at her. “Anyway, who did you have feelings for? Sharing secrets is a way to strengthen bonds.”

“I- um,” Camila bites down on her bottom lip and shakes her head, “it doesn’t matter.”

Lauren frowns. “Are you sure? I will tell you about one of my old crushes. One time, I liked Normani, before we were friends, but now she’s one of my best friends, so it’d be weird if I liked her.”

Camila sighs. “Ariana. I- I liked Ari.”

“Oh,” Lauren deflates, and she pulls Camila in for an awkward hug. “I’m sorry that you lost her, especially under such awful circumstances.”

“Yeah, well,” Camila pauses and sighs, looking away from her. “Can we not talk about it?”

“Okay,” Lauren pulls away from her and flashes a bright smile. “Did you know that lions have an average speed of eighty kilometres per hour?”

Camila blinks in surprise. “Uh, what?”

“You said you would like to talk about something else, and I know lots about lions,” Lauren shrugs, smiling happily when she thinks about her favourite animal. “What’s your favourite animal?”

“Um…” Camila just frowns and opens up the kitchen door, before she heads to the fridge. “I like dogs.”

“Oh, I don’t know that much about dogs. Like, factual things,” Lauren explains, watching as Camila gets the milk out of the fridge and pours two mugs full of it. “I was hoping you’d say a big cat.”

“Sorry,” Camila apologises, putting the milk in the microwave to heat it quickly. “You want toast?”

“Mhm, it’s part of my nightly routine,” Lauren confirms, and Camila gets the bread out and puts a slice in the toaster. Lauren frowns when she only puts one in. “Aren’t you having toast?”

“No, I’m not hungry,” Camila shrugs, getting the butter and a knife out of the fridge. “So, um…”

Lauren tilts her head to the side when Camila doesn’t elaborate. “Yes?”

“When did you… I don’t know… meet all your friends?” Camila asks, and Lauren beams, ecstatic that Camila is taking interest in her life. “Like… was it when you were little, or…”

“No, I didn’t have any friends when I was little, just my abuela.” Lauren shrugs, and Camila feels even guiltier for hating her in the past, for hating how everyone had been there for Lauren when her abuela had passed. “It was sophomore year when I met Lucy, because we were partners for a science project. At first, I was scared and didn’t say anything to her, but then after talking to my abuela, I decided I’d _put myself out there_. So, I talked to Lucy properly and she told me I was _cute_ and introduced me to Mani, Ally and Dinah.”

“That’s… sweet,” Camila comments, and takes their warm milk out of the microwave, passing Lauren a mug. “And you guys were like… instant friends?”

“Yes, Lucy and I were,” Lauren nods, sipping on her milk. “Mani told me recently that she wasn’t sure about me when we met, because I _came on strong_ , so I’m trying to figure out how to _come on weak._ But I’m not sure how to do that yet. Did I come on _weak_ or _strong_ when I talked to you for the first time?”

“I mean…” Camila lets out an awkward laugh, “tracking me down just to call me a bitch wasn’t exactly the subtlest thing.”

Lauren wrinkles her nose in confusion. “I didn’t call you a bitch. I called you a _black kettle._ ”

“I’m sorry for being so… abrasive,” Camila admits, and Lauren frowns, because she’d already apologised. “Initially, I thought it was a huge setup. Like, your friends had decided to pull a prank on me and made you approach me. And then I figured it was pity and I didn’t want it. And… you know, I didn’t want to get… attached.”

“Why would my friends want to pull a prank on you?” Lauren frowns, perking up a little when her toast pops up in the toaster, and she starts buttering it. “Would they prank you to be mean? Because I wouldn’t let them do anything like that. I always tell them off if they make fun of someone.”

After a few moments of thought, Camila smiles a little. “I guess I should be glad that someone like you is so popular.”

Lauren blinks in surprise, taking a bite of her toast. She waits until she’s chewed and swallowed to speak. “What do you mean _someone like me_?”

“Just… someone so sweet,” Camila admits, flushing embarrassedly. “Someone who wouldn’t just… I don’t know, mindlessly follow everyone else.”

“Oh,” Lauren pauses, but smiles when she takes the words in. “Thank you! I don’t think it’s very nice when people make fun of others. One time, Dinah called you a _social recluse_ , but also said you have a nice ass. I wasn’t sure if being a social recluse is really an insult, so I didn’t say anything.”

Camila blushes when Lauren says the words _nice ass_ , but doesn’t comment on it. “Um… yeah. That’s fine that you didn’t… say anything.”

Lauren hums and taps on her leg, finishing her toast off. “Anyway, I need to go shower now. And brush my teeth and wash my face. Then it will be bedtime.”

“Alright,” Camila comments, and heads out of the room. Lauren follows her, unsure if she’s supposed to, and hums to herself happily as Camila multitasks between brushing her teeth and showing Lauren how to work the shower.

“So, um…” Camila says once Lauren says she understands how to work the shower properly, “I’ll just… wait in my room?”

Lauren nods, pulling her shirt off, but leaving her bra on for the moment. “Okay.”

“And… and you’ll be back?” Camila questions, looking anywhere but Lauren. “Like… soon?”

“Yes,” Lauren nods, turning to Camila and flashing her a smile. “I will be approximately ten minutes. My shower will be much quicker, since I don’t have to shave anything.”

Camila blushes at Lauren’s overt bluntness. “Um, yeah. So… bye.”

When Camila awkwardly rushes out of the bathroom, Lauren smiles a little, rocking on her heels. She thinks this friendship is turning out to be a success.

-

Lauren doesn’t understand why she feels sparks any time she’s near Camila.

She thinks Camila might have a lot of static, and she wonders if she can investigate something like that in her next science project, but when she asks Lucy about it, the older Latina bursts out laughing, and Lauren doesn’t know what she’s said.

“Oh my fucking god,” Lucy practically chokes, “you’ve got a crush and you don’t even realise it.”

“A crush?” Lauren tilts her head to the side in confusion. She can’t have a crush on Camila, because they’re friends. “I don’t think so.”

“I can’t believe you like the antisocial emo,” Lucy snorts, rolling her eyes, “you know that literally anyone in this school would want to get with you, right?”

Lauren shifts uncomfortably, not liking the idea of that. “I don’t have feelings for anybody. And please don’t call Camila an _antisocial_ _emo_. She is not antisocial, because she’s friends with me, and while I don’t know how emotional she is, I don’t think she’s going to freak out when she hears a G note.”

Lucy just rolls her eyes. “Look, my point is, you’ve got a thing for her. You haven’t even kissed her and you’re feeling the sparks. Imagine how it’d feel if you _did_ kiss her.”

Lauren frowns. “You think I should experiment and kiss her?”

Lucy laughs. “Um, maybe not like that, Lo. Just… I don’t know, try holding her hand or something. See what happens and how you feel, and see how she reacts.”

“But I won’t _know_ how she reacts unless she says something,” Lauren points out, frowning down at her feet. “I can’t read her body language.”

Lucy lets out a long, dramatic sigh. “I would come with you when you go find her, and watch how she reacts for you, but she kind of hates me. Maybe get Dinah or Mani to go with you.”

“I don’t think she likes any of you,” Lauren announces, sighing, “before our sleepover, I didn’t think she liked me, though. But she called me cute a few times. Does that mean she has a crush on me?”

“Because she called you cute? No,” Lucy answers, and Lauren deflates, unsure why she’s so disappointed. “You being cute is just like, common knowledge at this point. Do you even know if she’s single?”

“Yes, she is single,” Lauren answers confidently, “she told me she’s only ever liked one person before, but they’re… um, she’s single.”

“Ooh, they’re what?” Lucy asks, smirking, “Spill the tea.”

“I’m not drinking tea, I’m drinking apple juice, and I’d rather not waste it,” Lauren says, holding up her juice box for emphasis. “And I can’t tell you, because I promised Camila that I would keep it a secret, so it is not my place to say.”

“Well, her telling you a secret is a good sign,” Lucy points out, “you know, if you have a crush on her. Because it doesn’t matter what she feels if you don’t feel anything back.”

“I don’t know, I just feel sparky around her,” Lauren shrugs casually, not sure how else to describe it. “She touched my hip by accident when we were watching _The Lion King_ , and it didn’t hurt or scare me.”

“You know what? Because I love you, I’m doing you this solid. Come on,” Lucy stands up, and Lauren frowns, sipping on her juice box. “We’re going to find your emo girlfriend and you’re going to hold her hand and I’ll see how she reacts.”

Lauren tilts her head to the side. “I thought you were waiting here for Nicole?”

“I can text her and tell her I’m helping our little Lo get a girlfriend.” Lucy rolls her eyes, holding out her hand for Lauren to take. “Come on.”

After a few moments of hesitation – and because she wants to finish her juice box – Lauren stands up, takes Lucy’s hand, and leads her to the music classroom, where she knows Camila will be.

Lauren hums happily on their way there, wondering if maybe she does like Camila, because she feels sparky around her. But when she gets to the door, she pauses outside, because it sounds like Camila is singing.

_“It’s you, babe, and I’m a sucker for the way that you move, babe,”_ Camila pauses, and Lauren peeks through the window in the door, watching as the younger girl, scribbles something down on a notepad. _“And I could try to run but it would be useless, you’re to blame…”_

Lauren tunes out, feeling bad that she may be intruding on a private moment, and when she remembers she’s with Lucy, she lets go of her friend’s hand and elects to cover the other girl’s ears instead.

Lucy just laughs and ducks away from her. “I bet she’s singing about you.”

Lauren frowns. “It is probably best that you go, because this seems very private.”

“I thought you wanted me to help you,” Lucy points out, and Lauren shakes her head, because this doesn’t seem like a good time. “Alright. Let me know how it goes though, okay?”

Lauren hums in response, and gives Lucy a hug goodbye, before she knocks on the door of the music classroom to announce her presence. The singing stops abruptly, but then there’s an awkward cough, and Camila shyly says, “Come in.”

“Hallo,” Lauren beams when she opens the door, and Camila smiles back a little, “though I feel like you wouldn’t want anybody to hear what you were singing, I thought it was very good, and you are very talented.”

Camila blushes a little, and Lauren makes a mental note of it. “Thanks. I wasn’t sure if you were coming, so… I figured I’d work on a song. The idea has been kind of… in my head for a couple days.”

Lauren hums. “Well, I liked it. And I am sorry if I’m late. I told Lucy I would sit with her while she waited for Nicole, because they were going to go off campus for lunch.”

“It’s okay. You’re here, so…” Camila mumbles, closing the notebook she’d been writing in and opening up her lunch. “How was class?”

“It was most enjoyable, since I had my science based subjects this morning,” Lauren smiles, “Lucy and I had to turn in a project. She was my partner because she asked first, but I get asked by lots of people to be my partner for biology projects, because I am very smart. I have a 5.0 GPA.”

Camila smiles a little. “Yeah, I’ve noticed that any time there’s a project, people pretty much call dibs on you and argue over who gets to work with you.”

“Yes, but I only let my friends work with me, unless it is assigned pairs.” Lauren says, deciding to take the plunge, and takes Camila’s hand. The younger girl jumps in surprise, but doesn’t comment on it. “Would you like to be my partner next time? I like to work with all of my friends, except for Dinah, because she makes me do all the work while she takes selfies. But as long as you do your part, it’s fine.”

“Yeah, well,” Camila bites down on her bottom lip and shrugs, “I don’t mind. I don’t really like… drawing attention to myself. I think maybe it’s best if-”

Lauren just frowns. “Why would partnering with me draw attention to you?”

“Since you’re like, the most popular girl in this shitty school?” Camila looks at her like she’s crazy. “And you just said that everyone fights over you for projects and stuff.”

“Yes, but I don’t like them, I like you,” Lauren smiles at her, and when Camila blushes again, Lauren makes a mental note. “I am very good at biology, so you will get a great grade.”

After a few moments of silence, and Lauren’s pout, Camila relents. “Alright. I guess we could partner.”

“Perfect,” Lauren beams, tapping out a pattern on the table with her free hand. “How long have you been writing songs?”

“A while,” Camila admits, shrugging, “it’s not a big deal, they’re not that good.”

“The part I heard was good,” Lauren says, and she genuinely means it. “You know I mean it, because I can’t really lie every well. It’s hard for me to think of things like that, because when I lie, I start to daydream and get interested in all of the other possible outcomes and lies I could’ve chose, and then I get distracted.”

“Is it hard for you?” Camila blurts out, blushing in embarrassment. “Sorry.”

Lauren just frowns. “Don’t apologise. Is _what_ hard for me?”

“Living in a society where things… where things don’t make sense to you,” Camila asks, and Lauren hums in thought. “Like… everything is kind of tailored against you in a way. A lot of social interactions depend on interpretations and dropping hints.”

“I think that’s stupid,” Lauren comments, not really answering the question. “Like, if you want something, just _say it_. Duh.”

Camila laughs. “Yeah, I guess your way is better.”

“Mhm, because I’m smart,” Lauren drums on the table happily, “that’s why I have a 5.0 GPA.”

“You’re probably going to be valedictorian, right?” Camila asks, and Lauren smiles, because she’d actually been approached last week about the opportunity. “I bet your parents are super proud.”

“Yes, they are,” Lauren announces, getting so happy that she bounces a little in her seat. “My parents are proud and I have lots of lovely friends and I am very happy.”

Camila watches her, a small, dreamy smile on her face, and if Lucy were here, Lauren would’ve known Camila’s real feelings then and there. But Lauren doesn’t notice, because she’s too busy rambling about how she’s excited to get to college and learn even more things about lions, because she’s going to be the best zookeeper ever when she’s older.

Camila, on the other hand, is thinking about how she’s _glad_ that Lauren can’t read her body language. Even though she was reluctant at first, Lauren really has wormed her way into a special place in Camila’s heart.

Camila just _really_ hopes she doesn’t get hurt.

-

When Camila’s phone rings, she jumps a little in shock, definitely not used to that, considering the only person who calls her is her mom. She considers hanging up and going back to her TV show, but then she looks at her phone, and sees Lauren’s contact picture.

It’s a picture Lauren had made her take at their sleepover; Camila is behind her, looking pouty, because she doesn’t like selfies, and Lauren is beaming, her green eyes bright, her hair messy, and her stuffed Nala tucked against her chest. Admittedly, it had made Camila smile, so she’d set it as Lauren’s contact photo.

She picks it up, answering the call. “Hey, Lauren. What’s up?”

“Um, hey,” Camila’s face sinks into a frown when the voice on the end of the line _isn’t_ Lauren’s. “Look, I know you hate me and everything, but Lauren would want you here, so-”

“Wait, who is this?” Camila frowns, unsure of what’s going on. “And why are you calling me from Lauren’s phone.”

“It’s Lucy.” The voice answers. “And I’m calling because I’m up at the hospital and—”

Camila doesn’t hear the rest of the words; Lucy’s voice is drowned out by the ringing in her ears, and she feels like she’s going to be sick. She hangs up the phone, not wanting _Lucy Vives_ to hear her freaking out, and cries into her hands, wondering _why, why is it always the people that I care about?_ She sobs, choking on her own breath, and she feels like she’s dying when the air doesn’t quite reach her lungs.

Her mom finds her before it can turn into a full-blown panic attack, holding her while she cries, thinking about how _Lauren is hurt_. _Just like Ariana._ She somehow manages to communicate this to Sinu, who hurriedly tells Alejandro to watch Sofi, and coaxes Camila out to the car, promising to take her up to the hospital.

Camila tries to calm herself down, because the last people she wants to see her cry are _Lauren’s friends_ , but there’s a terrible ache in her heart that she can’t seem to make go away. She knew she shouldn’t have let Lauren in, because she only ever ends up hurt. Good things never happen to her.

When her mom pulls into the hospital parking lot, Camila is still crying, but she puts on a brave face as Sinu walks her into the waiting room, preparing for the worst. When she sees Lucy, stood looking worried, but alone, she goes over.

Awkwardly, she looks over at the other girl, trying to keep her tears at bay. “Thank you for- for calling. Is she… is she okay?”

Lucy opens her mouth to reply, but then a pair of double doors to the right open up, and Lauren Jauregui walks out, smiling as usual, the only difference being her left arm in a sling. Despite herself, Camila runs at her, pulling her in for a tight hug and crying into Lauren’s shoulder.

“Don’t you _dare_ scare me like that ever again.” Camila murmurs into Lauren, careful not to press into her arm. “I thought I’d lost you.”

Lauren blinks in surprise, but gives Camila a one-armed hug back. “Hallo! I didn’t know you were here.”

Camila shakes her head when Lauren goes to pull away. “No. I almost- _god, you fucking terrified me._ Never do that again.”

“Do what?” Lauren asks, managing to pull away and send Camila a small smile. “I don’t know what I did, Camz. Can you please explain?”

At the nickname, Camila can’t help herself; she smiles, and takes a leap, pulling Lauren in for a rather watery kiss, feeling the same sparks she feels when their hands touch, when they brush against each other, only this time it’s more like fireworks. “That. That’s what you did. You made me like you, you idiot.”

Lauren tilts her head to the side, before she turns to Lucy with a smile. “You were right! I do have a crush on her!”

Lucy just laughs, rolling her eyes. “Took you long enough to figure it out.”

Lauren just smiles again, and turns back to Camila. “But- um, how did I scare you?”

“By being _in the hospital_ ,” Camila points out, and Lauren’s eyes widen in realisation. “What- what the hell even happened to you?”

“Oh, um,” Lauren blushes, looking down at her feet, “I tried to do a flip on my sister’s trampoline and I fell and broke my arm. But- but luckily, it’s the left one, so I can still write all of my papers in school. Anyway- um, thank you for kissing me, it was very enjoyable.”

Camila just smiles and pulls her in for another one, and Lauren decides that she never, ever wants it to stop.


End file.
